Spiders

I am writing this because just five minutes ago, I had a little freak out because I saw a spider in the bathroom.  I even took a picture of it because I didn’t know spiders that size even lived in my portion of the country.  Afterwards, I made the mistake of searching what types of spiders live near me.  As it turns out, spiders bigger than that one in the bathroom reside just outside.  Blehh.  Then to make things worse, I read a comment on this website said that a study from the University of Ohio reported that you are never more than five feet from a spider at any given time.  Double blehh.  Right now, I’m more scared than I have been in awhile, and that’s saying something because I watch and read a lot of freaky stuff.  Every little thing I feel, whether it be a tickle from my hair or a breeze from the vent, I have another little freak out to make sure that some creature isn’t crawling up my neck.

So thanks anonymous commenter for that.

I’ve come up with a rule for myself: if they’re outside, leave them alone, but if they’re inside, free game.  So spiders beware!  If you come one step into my living quarters, I will suck you up with a vacuum that will tear apart your eight legged body!  I already have to five spiders in the last five days.

I’d like to apologize to entomologists reading this because you may be getting ready to write a scornful comment about the importance of spiders to the ecosystem, and I know this; I took biology class, but those things creep me out.  This also raises another question: do entomologists study spiders?  The informal definition of entomologist is the studier of insects ( Webster’s would probably give you a much more intricate definition).  The spider is not an insect, it’s an arachnid.  And if entomologists do study spiders, where does it stop?  Entomologists can’t seriously study, say scorpions right?  That’s certainly straying from insects.

But I wandering from my point, if there even is one.  Spiders are creepy little things.  Not all are poisonous or bite or whatever it is spiders do, but it doesn’t take much for that little bugger to make my heart stop and slowly tiptoe to my vacuum cleaner.  I really hate being a girly stereotype, so it pains me to say that spiders do truly give me the heebie jeebies.

Believe what you want about spiders and try to change my mind, but when it comes to these sinister creatures, I will not be a pacifist as long as it is in my house.

Anyways, end of rant.

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